Distorted Hope Read online

  When Jason had come into the diner for the first time a few months ago and flashed that bright smile at me, I nearly melted. He was friendly and nice. Both he and Steve teased and flirted with me and I gradually began to look forward to their visits.

  And now Jason had asked me out. I liked him, but was he another Ryan?

  I picked up my phone and searched for Jason’s number.

  “I’m not letting you chicken out,” Stacey said, snatching the phone out of my hands.

  “Stacey!” I made a grab for my phone, but she pulled it out of my reach.

  “He’s not Ryan. Ryan was a sixteen-year-old asshole. Jason is a grown man who likes you.” When I tried to protest, she shook her head. “I’ve seen him look at you, Kyra. He likes you. Please trust me.”

  I fought within myself. Reason told me Jason wouldn’t do to me what Ryan had. My heart told me not to take the chance.

  “If he treats you badly, spit in his food next time he comes in.”

  I burst out laughing, relieving the tension and helping me listen to reason. I was being silly. I was twenty-two years old, not sixteen. “Alright,” I sighed.

  I followed Stacey back into her room and let her help me with my hair and makeup. After I put the dress and shoes back on, Stacey grinned. “You look hot. The purple really brings out your green eyes.”

  I rolled my eyes but when I looked in the mirror, I slowly admitted to myself that I looked pretty good. Those heels really did wonders for my calves.

  She grinned. “Maybe you’ll finally get laid.”

  “Stacey!” I exclaimed. “That’s not how I envision my first date with Jason.”

  Stacey rolled her eyes. “One of these days you need to have sex, Ky. It’s not healthy being a virgin at twenty-two.”

  I sighed. We’d had this conversation many times before. Stacey thought she couldn’t make it a week without sex. I had watched her go through boyfriends like socks, and it looked exhausting. I wanted my first time to be special, not just a one-night stand. “I’ll stick with my romance novels.”

  It amazed me that we’d managed to stay friends all these years. We were so different. Stacey was tall and blonde, had legs for days, and drool-worthy cleavage. I was average height with average breasts and hips. For all Stacey had done in getting my brown, curly hair to shine and my green eyes to glow for my date, in my everyday life, I was just ordinary.

  Stacey had dates every weekend or went clubbing if she didn’t. She dragged me to the club a few times but no one paid me any attention and I acted like a perfect wallflower. Maybe if I had let her dress me up as she wanted to it might have helped, but I was too afraid to try again.

  At exactly seven o’clock, a knock sounded at the door.

  “Punctual,” Stacey said with a smile.

  “He’s an engineer.” I took a deep breath and went to answer it, trying not to kill myself in the heels. Jason stood in the doorway wearing a light blue, button-up shirt, dark dress pants, and a bright smile.

  “Hi,” I said, stepping backward to open the door wider so he could enter. “Come on in.”

  “Hey, Kyra. Wow, you look great. I’ve never seen you out of your uniform.” He grinned as he gave me the onceover.

  Stacey snickered across the room and I shot her a dirty look. “Jason, this is my roommate, Stacey Hoskins. Stacey, Jason Marshall.”

  He greeted Stacey with a polite nod then looked back at me, tilting his head. “You know my last name?”

  I knew I was blushing. “Um, your credit card,” I whispered nervously.

  He grinned. “Observant woman. I like it.”

  My blush deepened and I excused myself to retrieve my purse and returned a moment later, composed. Jason and Stacey were talking about the cool summer days we’d been having—cool being relative. If it’s under a hundred and five, it’s a cool summer day.

  Jason asked if I was ready and I nodded, biting my lip. I said goodbye to Stacey and followed Jason out the door, glancing back for encouragement. Stacey grinned and gave me a thumbs-up.

  We walked down the sidewalk to where Jason had parked his black Mustang. He opened the door for me and I sat down in soft, gray leather seats and inhaled the scent of cinnamon as he made his way around to the driver’s side.

  “Do you like steak?” he asked, starting the car.

  “I do,” I answered, giving him a nervous smile.

  “I’m glad. One of my favorite restaurants is up in North Scottsdale. Do you mind a bit of a drive?”

  “Not at all.”

  He drove out of the apartment complex and headed toward the freeway. “So, what do you do when you’re not at work, Kyra?”

  “Not much, really. I like to read and I take a few ballet classes.”

  “You’re a ballerina?” he smiled.

  I laughed. My body was not a ballerina’s body. “Hardly. But I’ve danced most of my life, and I like it. It keeps me in shape. What do you do when you’re not a work?”

  He chuckles. “Not much. Between teaching, grading papers, and working on research, I don’t have a lot of time to myself.” He glanced sideways at me. “I like going to a diner on University when I have time. They have great fries.” He grinned.

  I smiled. “I’ve heard that.”

  “’Course there’s also a really pretty waitress who works there I’d been wanting to ask out.”

  “Oh?” I tried to act nonchalant as my heart started pounding in my chest. Was he talking about me? Did he really think I was pretty?

  “Yeah. But I was too nervous. I thought she might’ve had a boyfriend.” He smiled.

  “W-why would you think that?” Why would anyone think I was in a relationship?

  “I couldn’t imagine such a sweet, beautiful woman still being single.”

  My lips parted in surprise. “Oh,” I said, wishing I’d been able to say something wittier.

  “But then I heard her talking to a guy yesterday and it sounded like she was single, so I took a chance and asked her out. And she said yes.” He grinned. “Made my day.”

  I looked down and studied my hands nervously. He really had overheard the conversation. But it seemed to be a good thing. “It made my day, too.”

  “Then I guess we both had good yesterdays.”

  “I guess so,” I agreed, willing my heart to slow down to a normal pace.

  The car was quiet for a few minutes, then I asked him about being a chemical engineer. The subject occupied us until we arrived at the restaurant. The valet opened my door and I stepped out and waited for Jason to come around the car. He took my hand and we walked inside.

  Jason Marshall is holding my hand! Was this a dream?

  The restaurant was crowded, so he stood close to me while we waited for the table to be ready. He smelled good and his body radiated enough heat to keep me warm in the cool restaurant. For some reason, restaurants in the summer were always kept at freezing temperatures. For once, I didn’t mind.

  “So you said you have multiple engineering degrees?” I asked, trying to remember what we had been talking about.

  He nodded. “Yeah. Chemical, mechanical, and electrical. They integrate with each other nicely. I’ve done some projects with the military where they’ve especially come in handy.”

  “What kind of projects?”

  He grinned. “I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.”

  I giggled. “Then don’t tell me. I don’t think I’m ready to be killed right now.” Not when I’m on my first real date.

  “I’d hate to have to kill you.” He laughed.

  The maître d’ called Jason’s name and led us to a table next to a window.

  “Oh, how beautiful!” I exclaimed, gazing at the beautiful view of the setting sun.

  “I’m glad you like it.” His eyes met mine in the reflection of the glass and I felt my cheeks warm.

  He ordered wine and appetizers and we somehow got on the topic of childhood.

  Jason had been raised alongside two brothers
in Scottsdale by two loving parents. He got a scholarship to MIT and was hired as a military consultant right out of college. He did that for a few years and then decided he wanted to come back to Phoenix and teach at the university.

  I told him about my parents dying in a plane crash when I was five and being raised by my grandparents in West Phoenix. “I was thinking about taking a few classes at the community college after the beginning of the year,” I said, trying to make my story sound better than it was. It wasn’t completely untrue. How on earth could he be interested in me?

  “What do you want to study?”

  “Literature, I think. I think I’d like to become a book editor. Put my reading habits to good use.” I shrugged.

  He smiled back. “Sounds like a good plan. Can’t go wrong with a college degree.”

  Our food arrived and we turned to the subject of likes and dislikes. We both disliked sappy romance movies.

  “See, now I thought all women liked those kinds of movies.”

  I shook my head. “I find them annoying. I don’t mind sappy romance books, but the movies…” I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know. They’re just so dumb… and such a waste of time. I’d rather watch something silly. Although,” I paused thoughtfully, “I suppose I am a sucker for a good ol’ black and white romance. Especially if it’s a musical. I guess it doesn’t have to be black and white, just something made before the ‘60s.”

  “What’s your favorite movie?”

  “Hmmm. See, that depends on the genre.”

  Jason laughed. “I agree. Different moods make different movies my favorite. Though, I think The Lord of the Rings trilogy is an all-time favorite.”

  I nodded. “Yeah, I can see that. They’re definitely in my top ten.”

  “You like Tolkien?” He sounded surprised.

  “What’s not to like?”

  “Most women aren’t too into those epic movies.”

  I shrugged. “I’ve never been normal.”

  He grinned. “Who wants to be normal? So, how about one of your favorite movies?”

  “Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. Howard Keel. Mmm…” I giggled. “He has a voice that just makes you melt in your socks.”

  Jason laughed. “I don’t think I’m familiar with that particular movie. We’ll have to do a movie night sometime.”

  I felt a warm glow in my chest. He was acting like he wanted to take me out again. Was my life finally changing?

  We worked through dinner and dessert, learning more about each other. We had similar taste in movies and both dreamed of going to Europe, Ireland, and Scotland especially. His dream job would be to move to Switzerland and work at CERN. Mine was to be a ballet dancer. His was more based in reality.

  After dinner, Jason asked if I was up for a walk around Tempe Town Lake, the man-made joke of Tempe. I agreed and looked down at my shoes. “Sure.” I can walk in these things.

  Taking my hand, we walked slowly along the sidewalk next to the lake. I knew I should be feeling the pain in my feet, but his presence seemed to take away all the sensations in my body except the feeling of my hand in his. There were quite a few people around, but it was still quiet. We didn’t talk much but I didn’t mind. I just liked being next to him.

  The lake ended near the Tempe Center for the Arts, and we stopped near the pedestrian bridge to look out across the water. Few people bothered to come out this far at night when there weren’t any shows going on.

  The water lapped against the concrete below, making tiny, musical sounds. I grasped the metal railing—still wondering if I was dreaming or not—and gave a little shiver.

  “Are you cold?” he asked, his voice low.

  “I—” How could I be cold? It was May in Phoenix. I think it might have been the company. “I think it’s just the water.”

  Jason moved behind me, placing his hands on my shoulders. My heart started beating a million times a minute as he slid his hands up and down my arms. His hands were gentle and hot against my skin. A thought flashed across my mind, wondering if he would kiss me goodnight. I could count the number of kisses I’d had in my life on one hand, and I certainly wouldn’t mind one from him.

  He stepped closer and caressed the back of my shoulders with his thumbs. I concentrated on breathing normally as that small touch did very strange things to other parts of my body. Swallowing nervously, I grasped the railing and stared hard at a shadow in the water.

  Jason leaned down. “You smell good,” he murmured against my ear. “Like vanilla and lavender.”

  Goose bumps erupted on my arms and legs and I took in a shaky breath. His voice sounded so… sexy.

  I turned to make a silly comment about a man knowing the smell of lavender and his face was right there. My lips formed an ‘O’ in surprise. Oh, God, I wanted him to kiss me! I held my breath as we stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. I tried to turn away when I realized what I was doing, but Jason caught my cheek in his hand. He held it and caressed my cheekbone as he looked deeply into my eyes and then slowly leaned down to brush his lips against mine.

  I tried to concentrate on keeping my legs from turning to jelly, but his lips were very distracting. He kissed me gently and I closed my eyes as his lips lingered. Using his hand on my shoulder, he turned my body the rest of the way toward him, and I hesitantly placed my hands on his upper arms, feeling the muscles flex beneath his soft dress shirt as he pulled me against his body. The hand cradling my cheek slid behind my head, into my hair, and he slanted his mouth slightly, deepening the kiss. I clung to his arms, my legs unwilling to support me. When he nibbled slightly on my lower lip, a tiny gasp escaped my mouth.

  I’ve never been kissed like this before. I never want this to end…

  Jason and I had been dating for several months before we started talking about having sex. He knew I hadn’t been with a guy before and didn’t want to rush me. I was incredibly nervous about the subject.

  Over time, I’d learned to trust him and we’d finally agreed tonight was the night. It had become a tradition of ours to walk around the lake on Friday nights, and tonight was no different. We wandered around and stopped at the side of the lake where we’d had our first kiss.

  “This is my favorite place in the city,” he murmured, pulling me close and kissing me gently.

  I sighed against his lips. “Mine, too.”

  Jason pressed his lips to mine and wrapped his arms around me. I knew where this kiss would lead, and I was both thrilled and nervous at the same time. I think I might be falling in love with him…

  Something poked against the side of my ribs and I pulled back in confusion. Jason looked down at me for a moment before glancing behind me.

  His eyes narrowed. “Who are you?” he demanded. “What do you want?”

  “You two need to come with me,” a deep male voice said, soft but firm. “Now.”

  “Why should we?” Jason asked defiantly.

  “Because if you don’t, I will shoot your girlfriend.” He pressed what I now assumed was a gun harder into my ribs and I yelped in pain.

  My heart pounded so hard in my chest, it made it hard to breath. I looked up at Jason, who was eyeing the man behind me. I started to turn to look behind me but before I could, I was yanked away from Jason and up against a hard chest.

  “Are you going to come with us? Or am I going to have to shoot this pretty thing in my arms?”

  Tears of fear filled my eyes as I struggled to break free, but the man who held me was very strong and didn’t let me budge and inch. He jabbed the gun harder in my ribs and I whimpered.

  “Alright,” Jason said between gritted teeth. “Just don’t hurt her.”

  “As long as you cooperate, I won’t need to.”

  The poking in my ribs disappeared and the man moved me to his side, guiding me into the desert wash below with his arm firmly around my waist. He walked quickly and I stumbled in my heels, a curse escaping from my lips. He held me tighter around the waist. “Don’t try anything
funny,” he growled.

  “I wasn’t,” I protested. “My heels got caught in the dirt.”

  The man growled but slowed down.

  I heard Jason speaking behind me. “Let her go. If it’s me you want, fine. But let her go.”

  “He wants both of you,” another man behind me said.

  He? Who is ‘he’? I stumbled again, and the man guiding me picked me up without missing a step. I looked up and gasped when I recognized the man’s face—he’d been in the diner the day Jason asked me out and had come in several times since then. The man with the dark eyes.

  He looked at me, arching an eyebrow. “You remember me?”

  How could I forget? I nodded, shivering with fright.

  “I won’t hurt you as long as both of you cooperate. Do you understand?”

  I nodded again, thankful he was asking yes/no questions. I suspected my voice wouldn’t work properly at the moment.

  He climbed out of the wash and up to the frontage road where a black van waited with the back open. Dark-Eyed Man climbed in with me in his arms and sat on a bench along the side of the van.

  I wanted to ask him what he was going to do with us, but my mouth wouldn’t work. He smiled, not unkindly, and zip-tied my wrists together and then knelt to do the same to my ankles.

  Jason was pushed inside a moment later, and two men followed behind him. The door closed and the van slowly accelerated and merged onto the freeway.

  “Where are we going?” Jason demanded as his wrists were tied together.

  “A little journey,” Dark-Eyed Man said, looking out the front window. “Or rather, a long journey. Call it a job opportunity.” He turned to look at Jason. “If you try anything stupid, I will hurt her.” He lifted my chin with his hand, making me look at him. “There are so many ways to enjoy hurting a beautiful woman.” His hand slid down my neck and he cupped my breast.

  I gasped and twisted away from his touch.

  “I’ll cooperate, just please don’t hurt her,” Jason implored.

  Dark-Eyed Man chuckled. “There are so many ways to enjoy a beautiful woman without hurting her, as well.” His hand slid lower, down to my leg and up my skirt.